BANANAS IS BACK
by Kota Atok
Summary: Just a twisted story on an innocent manga. Tohru has fan girls, Yuki has fan boys, Kyo is a fan boy!
1. What the Fruba!

BANANAS

I'm truly very sorry for not continuing this sooner… I mean, two years?! What's wrong with me?!

DISCLAIMER I don't own Fruba!! (And be glad that I don't, or it'd end up like this… O-o)

**Chapter One: What the Fruits Basket?!**

It was early in the morning. Yuki, first up as usual, was about to make breakfast (Wait!! This is preposterous! Yuki isn't a morning person at all! Not to mention he can't cook! There has to be something twisted about this… Anyway,).He continued making breakfast (Which is apparently normal in this dimension). Once he was done, making curry, he went to get Kyo, Tohru, and Shigure out of bed. Yuki began stomping up the stairs, Tohru's room came first.

"Tohru… Get the _**fuck **_up,_**bitch**_!" Yuki said in an angry tone.

"I've been up you ass hole!" She said annoyed.

"Well then, _Miss_ _Honda_, get the fuck out of bed, and in the fucking kitchen!" Yuki ordered her.

"You know what, fuck you!" She replied angrily.

"Humph, bite me." Yuki said as he went to go get Shigure. "Hey, Shi…" He stopped as he saw there was no one in the room. Yuki shrugged and reluctantly went to Kyo's room.

"Hey, Yuki baby, want to have sex, hot stuff?" Kyo stated with a huge grin on his face.

"Okay, Kyo look, I might be gay, just like you, but we can't be together. Either way, come down for sex… I mean penis… I mean breakfast! Ye-yeah, breakfast. Yuki said with a blush.

"Alright, whatever you say, sweetums." Kyo said as Yuki left his room red faced. As he left, Yuki thought to himself.

How could I say all of that in front of the refrigerator… I mean, my one true love, Kyo..? Someday, I swear that we will be together forever… Once we get rid of that nuisance, Tohru! Yuki continued to think diligently about this until… BREAKFAST!!

By the way, you should all be thinking DUN, DUN, DUN! right now.


	2. BREAKFAST!

**Bananas**

You know, after writing the last chapter I thought it was much longer than it really was… ;;

**Chapter Two: BREAKFAST!! (Not as good as originally thought…)**

Now, Tohru, Kyo, and Yuki were all sitting at the table, eating the curry that Yuki had made. "You know, Yuki, this curry is very delicious. Why can't you make me breakfast in bed with only that thin little half apron I bought you for my birthday? That'd be a nice little change." Kyo said, imagining the thought.

"How many times do I have to tell you, Kyo, I'm not going to do that for you… One, it's dangerous with hot soup, what if I spill it on my…--" Yuki attempted to explain.

"I'd lick it off." Kyo said, grinning as the room fell to silence. Tohru dropped her chopsticks and got her stuff for school.

"Why don't you two just keep it in your pants until I'm gone?! The least you two could do is to **GET A ROOM**!" Tohru said running out the door. Kyo just grinned as he watched Yuki's mouth drop more and more with each passing second.

"Kyo, listen… Stop trying to get in my pants, atleastfornow." Yuki said deep in thought.

"And why is that, my little homo-kins?" Kyo said jokingly.

"You know that she would kill us if we got together. She told us that as soon as I turned gay along with you…" Yuki said, making a flashback inevitable.

_FLASHBACK (This was in Tohru's room, just after Kyo had done nearly the same thing. With practically the same outcome.)_

"_Honda San, I love you. I want to be with you always. I just can't wait anymore!" A desiring Yuki said._

"_Then, why wait? I've always wanted to… experiment." Tohru said, already turned on._

"_But… Are you sure…? Yuki asked._

"_Of course, why else would I have brought it up?" Tohru said, stripping already. As Yuki observed the first female body he had ever seen naked, he noticed something strange. She had many visible STD's and looked like she had experienced sex many times. Yuki just stared in fear, not wanting to go near her. "What's wrong, Yuki?" She asked him as he passed out onto the floor. _

_(Yes, she did do the same thing to Kyo earlier, though he didn't pass out. He ran as if for his life. But, for some reason it had more of an effect on Kyo than Yuki. And __**this**__ is how they turned gay. Later when Tohru found out about them turning gay, she threatened them that if they were to ever get together, she would kill them. Why you ask? Because, she wanted them to be more of her sex toys and not go after each other.) END FLASHBACK_

The both of them shuttered at the memory. Then they themselves set out for the school without another word.

(Sigh I really disappointed myself with this chapter, I could have done so much more with it… 3 I want some CONSTRUCTUVE criticism pl0x?)


	3. A Queer School

**Bananas **

**Chapter three: A Queer School!**

Once Yuki and Kyo had caught up to Tohru, who was already at the school, they went inside for what appeared to be a regular day. Nothing much happened the rest of the day, except Yuki's fan club girls switched to being Tohru's fan girls. And, Yuki got himself a group of fan boys instead. As for Kyo, he made out with some random men in the restrooms. Afterword, he became president of Yuki's fan boys. After school, Tohru left for home, being trailed by her fan girls. As for Yuki, Kyo and the other fan boys had chased him into a corner, outside of the school. "C'mon, Yuki baby, give us a show!" Fan boy number two pleaded.

"Whoo, do it!" Agreed fan boy's numbers three through thirteen.

"Boys, boys, calm down." Kyo smirked. "Why don't you guys just leave the two of us alone for a while?"

"Oh yeah, go for it Kyo!!" Shouted some of the fan boys as they left. At the sound of all of this, Yuki was somewhat intrigued, but also frightened. He didn't want his first time to be rape! Especially when he was the one being raped! He tried to have faith in Kyo that he was only kidding. But by the look on his face, there was no stopping him.

"Kyo, stop! Don't come any closer! Please, what if Tohru finds out? She'll have both of our heads!" Yuki pleaded.

"C'mon, Yuki darling. I know you want this just as much as I do. You see, I read your little diary here." Kyo said as he pulled out Yuki's diary, which enclosed all of Yuki's personal thoughts about everything.

Yuki gasped. "Kyo, give that back! How could you, you monster!" Yuki said in tears.

"I just wanted to make sure you felt the same way about me. And apparently you care more about me than_ I _care about you even. I'm surprised, the way you kept denying me, I almost lost faith." Kyo said, tossing the diary to the cornered Yuki.

"I've always loved you. I had to hide it though. Damn that Tohru! If it weren't for her, we could really be together… But, I guess that we could be together, but what about Tohru?" Yuki confessed.

"Heh, we'll worry about her later. For now, let's just have some fun." Kyo said bringing Yuki over to a nearby bench. Kyo made Yuki sit while he began unbuttoning his pants.

"Kyo, what if somebody sees us?" Yuki asked, blushing.

"Don't worry; I got those fan boys of yours on the case. They are around this area, with their backs turned, and they will not let anyone through." Kyo said happily as he removed his boxers.

"But how?" Yuki asked staring at Kyo.

"I just told them that if they looked, or let anyone through, that you would hate them for the rest of your life." Kyo said with a smile as Yuki began sucking. But, just as soon as they started, they heard fan boy number two calling to them.

"Kyo, Prince Yuki, Tohru is coming and in a hurry! You told us to tell you if we saw her." Fan boy number two said.

"Damnit! Kyo screamed as he pulled his cloths back on. Come on, Yuki; let's take the long way home." Kyo said, dragging Yuki through the woods. They eventually made it home to find Tohru asleep in her room.

"What the..?" Yuki whispered in surprise.

"Well, either she is a really fast walker and sleeps quickly, or we have a traitor among the thirteen!" Kyo said, angrily,


	4. In the dark

**BANANAS **

**Chapter four: In the Dark.**

Later that night, while Yuki was sleeping, naked as usual, he was visited by an unexpected someone. Though, you can all guess who it was, so I guess he was visited by a completely expected someone! Anyway, Kyo came into his room late in the night. As he went in, he was clumsy enough to knock over and break a random vase that was inconveniently on top of a dresser that was yet again inconveniently right next to the door. "Shit!" Kyo screamed, waking Yuki and practically the whole neighborhood up.

"What the?" Yuki said in surprise.

"Shhh!" Kyo hissed as he covered Yuki's mouth and hid with him in the shadows as Tohru walked by, bat in hand.

"Smooth move, exlax." Yuki said, removing Kyo's hand from his mouth. "What were you thinking coming here in the middle of the night anyway?" Yuki asked.

"I'll give you one guess" Kyo hinted as he grabbed Yuki's hand.

"No!" Yuki said, pulling away. "Tohru is awake, what if she sees us together?"

"She won't do anything. And if she tries to, I'll take care of her. You don't need to worry anymore." Kyo comforted Yuki as he hugged him.

"Okay… I trust you." Yuki said as he put his butt into the air. "But you have to put it in fast." Yuki said, horny as ever.

"Heh, as you wish, Yuki kens." Kyo said as he removed his clothing. Kyo put it in and moved fast. Yuki had to hold his mouth shut with one hand and hold himself up with the other. After they were through, Yuki fell to the ground.

"That… That felt so good…" Yuki moaned.

"It better have." Kyo said as he got dressed and went into his own room. However, when he got there, Tohru was waiting for him.

"I know about all of it." Tohru said angrily. As soon as she had spoken those few words, Kyo's eyes widened.

"But… How?" He asked, not knowing what to do, or weather to believe her. Then, she pulled out a video camera. As she was doing so, Kyo's mouth dropped.

"What's that…?" Kyo asked fearing the worst.

"Heh, why don't I let you find out?" Tohru said as she plugged the camera into Kyo's computer. As soon as it was done loading, she showed him the whole video. The video was of the two of them having sex in Yuki's room. The video appeared to have been taken through the window.

"Oh my god… But how?!" Kyo said in confusion and anger.

"That's for me to know, and you to find out." Tohru said snickering as she began leaving, camera in hand. "I'll decide what to do with you later, but if you tell Yuki… Let's just say that it would NOT be in your best interest." When she had left, Kyo fell to the ground and passed out. The next morning, Yuki came into Kyo's room to see him lying on the floor.

"Kyo! What happened?!" Yuki anxiously asked as Kyo woke up in Yuki's arms.

"Oh, how I wish I could tell you…" Kyo whispered as he saw Tohru peering through the doorway, smirking.


	5. BAD END

**BANANAS CHAPTER FIVE: The Ball!**

And now it was the dreaded breakfast time of day. It had been weeks since anyone had seen Shigure. And yet, no one cared. It makes you wonder who is paying the bills seeing as none of them have jobs. Anyway, Tohru was sitting right between Kyo and Yuki, seemingly tearing them apart in every way. They even took different paths to school. Though, Kyo wasn't planning on showing up to his classes today, he had some rather bothersome business to take care of. He had called a meeting of the Yuki fan club 13. Once they were all there, the meeting began. "Okay, I have called this meeting together because I have reason to believe that there is a traitor among us!" Kyo declared. All of the members gasped in disbelief, except for member number two.

"And just what reason would this be, oh strait less leader?" Member number two asked.

"Well, simply put, Tohru found out about Yuki and me. And because of that we can't be together. She has video evidence that shows us… Expressing our love for each other. So, I thought, how else could she have gotten the video aside from one of you, seeing as she was at home the whole time." All of the other members chuckled as Kyo explained his reasoning. "Why are you all snickering?!" Kyo shouted.

"Well, Kyo, simply put we don't like seeing you and Yuki together. He should be with one of us!" Member number two said. "So we are kicking you out of the fan club." As Kyo heard this, surprised as he was, he accepted it. He didn't need them anyway, he could find a way to deal with it. After school, Yuki went into the garden, where Kyo was playing with a bouncy ball. As Kyo saw Yuki, he thought of a scheme that would make them both happy.

"Whoops." Kyo said as the ball 'slipped' out of his hands in Yuki's direction. Yuki was surprised as the ball somehow went down his shirt and into his pants, where Kyo was 'forced' to retrieve it. They went out to a hotel and had their fun. They decided to both get jobs soon afterward. They eventually saved up enough money to move out of Shigure's house. This way, Tohru couldn't interfere with their plans, or the fan club.

AUTHOR COMMENT… Sorry readers, I just lost my inspiration…… Maybe someday, I'll make another story, but I'll have to find time… I apologize again, and if you all really want me to, I can try to rewrite the ending. Thanks for you're support!


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